SMIRNOFF – Tea Partay

Ayn Rand’s cod-philosophy has had a discernible impact on American politics. Intermixed with Christian fundamentalism, it inspired the twenty-first-century Tea Party. One of the movement’s leading lights, Senator Rand Paul – not named after Rand; his first name is ‘Randall’ – has boasted of being a ‘big fan of Rand’, though he is also a professed Catholic believer. Randian ideas have had an influence on American public policy.

John Gray, “From Nietzsche to Ayn Rand”, Seven Types of Atheism (2018)

p(rep)-unit forever
p(rep)-unit

p(rep)-unit!
what’s up fellas?
yo yo, where my WASPs at?
M.V. — martha’s vineyard!
holla back!

tell buffy to chirp me
sip sip!

yo, straight outta cape cod
we’re keeping it real
we’re gonna have a party — makes the ladies squeal

we’re gonna turn it out with our parents’ riches
we’ll serve smirnoff raw tea and finger sandwiches

we keeps it real
by real, we mean rich
from new hampshire to vermont
from the maine main line to greenwich

cause no one’s harder than a new england gangster
we drink raw tea on the south wing veranda

let’s have a tea partay
high tea in the parlor makes the ladies holler
let’s have a tea partay
smirnoff raw tea: lemond, peach, and raspberry

we sail yachts and we ride on horses
every meal we eat comes with multiple courses

when it’s time to party, we have a tea party
and we keeps it real — the old money way

haters hateshaters like to counter clown our ivy league educations
but they’re just jealous
cuz our familiesfathers run the nations

yo, where’s the love at the tea partay?
but if you’re gonna show up, send an rsvp our way

haters!
holla back!

let’s have a tea partay
high tea in the parlor makes the ladies holler
let’s have a tea partay
smirnoff raw tea: lemond, peach, and raspberry

we play croquet and we go rollerbladin’
here’s to the homies on lock for insider trading

it’s a tea partay from maine to amagansett
we might be vanilla but our lab(rador)s are chocolate

we’re chilling from our heads
and white tennis visors
right down to our toes
in a pair of top-siders

so now it’s time to break
but please will you promote smirnoff raw tea parties
and we’ll send you a thank-you note
in cursive

tea partay
tea partay
tea partay
let’s have a tea partay

please drink responsibly
and visit teapartay.com
playa!