PRIMUS – Wynona’s Big Brown Beaver

From the album Tales from the Punchbowl (1995)

Wynona’s got herself a big brown beaver
And she shows it off to all her friends
One day, you know, that beaver tried to leave her,
So she caged him up with cyclone fence
Along came Lou with the old baboon
And said Recognize that smell?
Smells like seven layers,
That beaver eats Taco Bell

Now Rex he was a Texan out of New Orleans
And he travelled with the carnival shows
He ran bumper cars, sucked cheap cigars
And he candied up his nose
He got wind of the big brown beaver
So he though he’d take himself a peek,
But the beaver was quick and he grabbed him by the kiwis
Now he ain’t pissed for a week
(And a half!)

Now Wynona took her big brown beaver,
And she stuck him up in the air
Said I sure do love this big brown beaver
And I wish I did have a pair
Now the beaver once slept for seven days
And it gave us all an awful fright
So I tickled his chin and I gave him a pinch
And the bastard tried to bite me
Wynona loved her big brown beaver
And she stroked him all the time
She pricked her finger one day and it occurred to her
She might have a porcupine